Here we go

Yes, this is the winter of my discontent.  The twice weekly blizzards we’ve been having here in Philly haven’t helped, but it’s really not about the weather.

I will be turning SIXTY this year! I know! I can’t believe it either! But, there it is… waiting for me just a few months away.

Being born in 1950 puts me pretty much right in the middle of the boomers, so I know there are some of you ahead of me and some who will be joining me shortly. And I hope you will participate in this ‘discussion’ (lament?) if you’d like to.

We were the generation that coined the phrase, ‘Don’t trust anyone over 30′, for crying out loud!   Which is a bit odd when I look back on it, because by the time I was 30 I had been married for 12 years and my kids were 11 and 9. So for all intents and purposes I was actually part of the ‘establishment’ that we were not trusting.   I was born old actually, and I like to think that in many ways I ‘youthened’ as I grew up.  I think that’s why I’m having such issues now.   Not so much with turning 60 as with why does it bother me?

The reason I say I was born old is because my mother got pregnant with me when she was 16 and she has always blamed me for that.  There were plenty of times in my life that I wished I had been able to prevent that pregnancy, but not for a very long time.

I assumed the role of mother at a very early age.  In fact you could say that once I came into the World I was the mother and she was the child.  Then 9 years later when she got pregnant again, by choice, she could not have been more excited.  Why wouldn’t she be excited… she had a built in nanny from the get go!

I have a very long memory, which I admit is at times selective.   I can actually remember sitting at the kitchen table with my Grandmother having coffee when I was two years old.   I swear this is true.    I never liked milk and my Grandmother figured out how to get me to drink it… by putting coffee in it.  Genius!  And of course some sugar.   I imagine we probably sat there like a couple of old ladies talking about what to make for dinner.   In reality my Grandmother wasn’t even that old at the time.  We had a typical ‘Southern’ family of overlapping generations, but I’ll get into that another time.

As for my impending birthday I am trying to understand why it’s bothering me so much.   I have embraced every decade in my adult life, and can honestly say life has gotten better with each decade.  I orchestrated my own parties for each milestone birthday and probably had more fun than my guests at each one.   I’m not planning one this year.   Perhaps it’s about the down hill slide after this birthday.   I mean, we’re living much longer now, but 120?   So I can no longer be ‘middle aged’, but don’t even think about considering me ‘elderly’.
To be continued….

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